Marsie's Menagerie

The Horror of Wet Paws!

2012-01-16T14:31:00.000-08:00

LET ME IN!!!!!!!

The sign that hangs outside our front door.

"Hold still, I have to wipe your paws!" That's the rainy day mantra here at the Newbold residence. Nag, thy name is Marsie. At the first sign of rain, I get a special towel out and drape it over the front door handle. That way I'm armed and ready.

There are only five hard and fast doggie rules at our house. They are:

No nipping, biting or growling.
Do your "business" outside. No peeing or pooping in the house.
No chewing up anything that is not a "chewie" designed for that purpose. (This goes double when it comes to your mother's shoes.)
Stay out of the trash cans.
Wait to get your paws wiped if they are wet or muddy BEFORE you enter the house.

None of these is negotiable. But reason flies out the window the moment it rains or snows. You see, Nosey doesn't like to get her paws wet. (Just like Nipper who came before her.)

But, technically, that's not true. When we are taking walks she makes a beeline for and jumps into every puddle she sees. But for some reason, in her furry little mind, she has decided that walking outside to go to the bathroom and getting the bottom of her feet wet with rain or snow has a decided "yuck" factor. It reminds me of the character "Sheldon" in CBS's "The Big Bang Theory." Nosey has arbitrary "rules" that may not make sense to anybody else, but they can't be broken.

So, Nosey refuses to go outside when it is wet out unless she is literally pushed, and she puts the brakes on. A 60 lb. Basset Hound can make herself dead weight if she wants. A simple thing like going outside to go to the bathroom turns into a BIG production. Between you and me, I suspect she has kidneys made of cast iron and could hold "it" indefinitely. It's one of those things where your mother makes you wear a sweater because she's cold? I make her go when I fear that she'll die of uremic poisoning.

Then, once she's outside she acts as though she's walking on eggshells or hot coals, lifting each paw v-e-r-y-s-l-o-w-l-y. Once she's found the perfect spot and done her business, she comes to the door, then tries to run from me when I try to catch her. Just the sight of the towel makes her start channeling her inner greased pig. Finally, she falls to the ground like one of those protesters you see on tv, who go totally limp in shows of passive resistence.

The things we do for love (and to avoid shampooing the carpet!)

Nosey in the Snow! (Or, what a difference a year makes!)

2012-01-12T15:48:00.000-08:00

TRAPPED LIKE A DOG! (Or, Nosey's Exciting Adventure.)

2012-01-09T18:30:00.000-08:00

It began innocently enough. I put Nosey in the car and told her to wait, I was just going to get the mail.

I've done it dozens of times. The mailbox is just outside the garage door.

"C'mon, Mom... Let's go!"
*CLICK*
"Uh, oops... What was that?".
"What's the matter, Mom? Why aren't you opening the door?"
"What do you mean it is locked?"
"Who locked it?"
"Well, if I did it was an accident. My paw must have slipped."
"Well, use your key."
"It's inside your purse?"
"Well, go inside and get your purse...I'll wait."
"Your purse is right here locked inside the car with me? Where?
Oh, there. I see it now."
"Well, get your spare key."
"The spare key is in your wallet?"
"Well, where's your wallet?"
"Inside your purse? Well, how can you get to it if it is locked inside the car with me?"
"Aaaaaarrrrrrroooooooohhhhhhhhh!"
"Let me out, I can't breathe...there's no air inside this stinking MINI Cooper. Oh, help, help...AAAARRRRRROOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!"
"I can't open the door from the inside, I don't have opposable thumbs!"
"Oh, I'm dying of thirst. There's no food in here, either. No, it's been more than a couple of minutes, I've been trapped here for days!"
"No, no...it can't have been just a few minutes. Don't forget I live in dog time. One of your years is seven of mine. How does that break down in minutes? Surely, that counts for something!"
"AAAARRRRRRROOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!!!"
"It's like an oven in here!"
"It's in the 40's? Well, it sure feels hot."
"My nose is getting all warm and dry. That's a bad sign, isn't it?"
"Mommy! Break a window with one of your high heels!"
"You're sure I'm not going to die in here?"
"Call the SPCA!"
"Aaaaarrrrrrrrooooooooohhhhhhhh!"
"Call Daddy!"
"He can't come home to bring his spare key? He's conducting a lecture in 5 minutes? He won't be home until 7:30 p.m. tonight? It's only 4:15 now?"
"Gulp, I can't stay here until then."
"Call Grandpa! He'll know what to do! You and Daddy obviously can't handle this."
"Grandpa says to call the police? Well, why didn't you think of that? Hurry, Mommy, hurry...the air is running low and I'm feeling faint. My fur is falling out in clumps. Everything is getting hazy...".
"You can't call 911? What? The non-emergency number? Time is running out, lady...if this isn't an emergency, I don't know what is.....".
"AAAAARRRRRROOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"The dispatcher is giggling? What? She doesn't mean to laugh at our problem, but they've never had a call about a Basset Hound locking itself inside a MINI Cooper?"
"This is no laughing matter. We're in the middle of a crisis! This is bigger than when Baby Jessica fell down the well. Call Channel 9 and get the I-Team on this. Hagit Limor will get to the bottom of this and heads will roll. "
"Oh, they're sending someone over right away? She says to take pictures?"
"Oh, I have gotta pee."
"What do you mean I just peed five minutes ago before I got into the car?"
"Well, in that case I gotta poo-poo."
"I did that too?"
"Why did you lock me inside the car, Mama? I'm just an innocent dog...".
"AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!"

"What's that sound?"
"The cops are here?"
"Thank goodness...not a minute too soon!!!! I'm here, I'm here....AAAARRRRROOOOOHHHHHHHHH!"

Officer Stubbeman to the rescue.

"What do you mean you aren't going to shoot out the window? "
"There's a special tool to open the door?"
"Wouldn't a bullet be quicker?"
"Well, hurry...I'm dying in here!"
"AAAAAAAARRRRRRROOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!"

"Hurry, hurry!"
"Call the life squad...".
"They don't send the life squad for dogs?"
"Don't they know who I am?"
"I am a very important dog. I know Frank Marzullo from Channel 19 and he's a registered meteorologist. Oh, believe it. I have his personal, private telephone number. He'll make it rain on you...or hail. He's smart and can do things like that just by snapping his fingers. You SHOULD be scared."
"No, I don't have to prove it."
"I also happen to know John Lomax from Channel 12. He's a hotshot anchorman and he'll cover the bee-jeebies out of this story."
"Stop laughing."
*CLICK*

"Oh, thank goodness!"
"Officer Stubbeman, you're my hero!"
"I love you, I love you, I love you!!!!!!"
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Let me give you a great, big sloppy Basset Hound kiss!"
"Now, arrest my Mother for negligence...".

All Pets Poop, Pee AND Slobber!

2012-01-09T07:36:00.000-08:00

It's true!!!!

Believe it! It happens in the nicest of homes...even MINE!!!!

Here's living proof! Nosey slobbering on the bed sheets on my husband's side of the bed. I made it fresh the day before. Hey, it'll dry. But I have my standards...slobber can stay but poop, pee and puke and muddy paw prints warrant stripping the bed. Now you know. Call the Board of Health if you don't like it! ;)

Yup, it's true. As surely as all dogs go to heaven, they poop, pee, puke, slobber, shed and apply "shnozzy" nose-print smudges to sparkling-clean windows, mirrors and eyeglass lenses.

Even though this is factual statement, I have had dogs all of my life and can't imagine living one day without one. (And, I'm not certifiably crazy yet!) All I can say is thank goodness for paper towels, carpet cleaning machines, stain sticks, Dustbusters, lint brushes and Windex.

You can't have a dog or any other type of pet without a sense of humor, because even the most perfectly housebroken ones make mistakes once in awhile. Big ones. Once, years ago I threw a fancy cocktail party that took days to plan and hours to clean and prepare for. (Think Martha Stewart obsessive-compulsive here, people.) The night of the big soiree, my Cocker Spaniel, Amanda, walked into the party, sauntered over to one of our friends (the one who just happened to be a Veterinarian of course), gazed soulfully into his eyes, squatted and peed at least a gallon (well, it seemed that much to me at the time) onto the wall-to-wall carpeting. Nice. As you can imagine, "Mommy" nearly dropped the silver tray of cocktail wienies she was holding. I must have looked so elegant on my hands and knees mopping up that mess in my little black dress and pearls; like some demented June Cleaver, but I digress...

Oh, and another time I was selling a house and had everything prepped for the Realtor to show the potential buyers (including baking cookies so the place would smell all homey) and my Border Collie, Zero, threw up all over the master bedroom carpeting just as the doorbell rang. (Yup, that added just the right "homey" touch.) Then, there was the other Cocker Spaniel (Goldie) who exploded a "Bowel Bomb" inside my new car just because I dared to leave her (with the windows cracked on a cool fall afternoon) in the car for five minutes to dash into the post office. That was one long, stinky ride home with all the windows down. Talk about a "special delivery"...

Bottom line? Thank goodness for their adorably fuzzy little faces and loyal dispositions, because sometimes when I'm standing at the sink, running yet another bucket full of hot-sudsy water and snapping on my rubber gloves, I wonder why we even give them houseroom. But that thought never lasts.

What can I say except that I'm a sucker for a waggily tail...

Home Baked Doggie Treats!

2012-01-08T16:06:00.000-08:00

Just out of the oven...

I made my "neighborhood-famous" peanut butter dog cookies today and Nosey couldn't be happier. They're quick, easy and fun!

Here's the recipe:

Marsie's Menagerie Peanut Butter Doggie Biscuits

The official taste tester!

(Makes about 2 dozen depending on the size of your cookie cutters)

Ingredients

3 cups whole wheat flour
2 Tbsp. olive oil
1/2 cup crunchy peanut butter
2 large eggs
1 cup water
Cooking spray

Method

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.
Spray cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray.
Combine ingredients in a large mixing bowl. (I do it with my hands and wear non-latex medical gloves.)
Mix until ingredients form a ball.
Roll out on a floured surface (about 1/4 inch thickness).
Cut out shapes with cookie cutters.
Place cookies on cookie sheet and place in oven.

Looks like Nosey got caught with her head in the cookie jar!!!!

Bake for 25 minutes and cool on rack.

Animal Crackers in My Soup...and Psyche

2012-01-07T11:42:00.000-08:00

Lions and tigers and bears... Oh, my!!!

As much as I love them, I can’t look at a package of animal crackers without flinching. Why? Well, sit back because I’m going to tell you.

It all started on the first day of kindergarten. We were given construction paper nametags with an animal cracker glued on for decoration. The teacher had us sit cross-legged on the floor while she gave a little welcome speech that I must not have been listening to very closely because I was busy eating the animal cracker off of my nametag. Well, more like gnawing, since I didn’t even bother to take it off. But, what I did hear quite plainly was, “Make sure to wear your nametags to school tomorrow.”

I looked down at mine in horror. There was nothing but a big, wet slobber mark where the animal cracker used to be.

Well, now I’d done it! Obviously I couldn’t go back to school because I’d eaten the animal cracker off of my nametag. Only five years old and my life was ruined. It was just the first day and already I’d flunked out. Better I had died in my cradle than to put my family through such shame. (My drama queen tendencies started very early.)

Mother was ever-practical. “We’ll just buy a box of animal crackers and glue one on to replace the one you ate,” she reasoned. More panic. I couldn’t remember exactly what kind of animal had been on that darned nametag. Nothing she or my father said could convince me that I wouldn’t get graded on that sort of thing.

While the replacement animal cookie dried on my nametag, I spent a restless night in my canopy bed tossing, turning and going over different scenarios in my mind. I just knew that Mrs. Pogue was going to greet me at the door asking: “Marsie Hall, is that a buffalo on your nametag? Where is the elephant that was assigned to you? What have you done with it? Speak up! What’s that you say? YOU ATE IT? Do you realize what you have done? You are a disgrace to the morning kindergarten. Pack up your crayons and get out. Never darken the door of Robert D. Johnson grade school ever again!”

Mother drove me to school the next day. I wanted her to wait and keep the car running so I could make a quick escape, but the teacher never noticed.

Imagine that!

SHOWTIME!

2012-01-06T15:23:00.000-08:00

Here's Nosey checking out her Mommy's favorite Christmas present, a red ukulele.

Here's the plan, I'm going to learn how to play it and Nosey is going to learn to dance on her hind paws. We'll work up an act, find a street corner and ta-da... People will throw coins into the open ukelele case and we'll be rich! I might even get us matching outfits.

A psychic once told me that in a past life I was an organ grinder's monkey. Perhaps the universe is truly unfolding according to plan.

Well, time's a wastin'. Gotta go rehearse... Now, where is Nosey? She was here just a minute ago.

Urinetown... Or, The Adventures of Potty-Training a Basset Hound!

2011-08-09T06:57:00.000-07:00

The Tools of the Trade!

Mr. & Mrs. Thomas M. Newbold joyfully announce that their Basset Hound puppy, Nosey Anne, is "officially" house-broken at the age of 8 1/2 months.

It has been quite a long haul, with many false starts... But, she has gone several weeks without any accidents and has been granted full run-of-the-house privileges.

Now, I'm no Martha Stewart, but these months have kept me on my toes. I now own an industrial-style carpet cleaner, a tiny hand-held one and have tried just about every urine remover/neutralizer known to man. I am partial to Urine Gone that you can buy at Target, but most everyone I've tried works about the same.

Today the Stanley Steemer guys are coming to deep clean the rugs and carpets, but I am proud to say that I have kept up my part of the deal. We spent more money on paper towels and rubber gloves lately than on groceries!

I came up with one thing on my own that has gotten the smell out of rugs and upolstery. The label on most of these cleaners says to saturate the area and leave it to soak in. I didn't feel I was getting it in deep enough that way, so went to the vet and asked for a syringe with the longest needle possible. I used that to get the solution deep into the padding of the carpets.

Guess what? It works... Though I feel a bit like a drug fiend when I'm doing it! ;)

"Marsie's Menagerie's" Upcoming Events!

2011-06-12T10:04:00.000-07:00

Wow! It is hard to believe, but after a year and a half of writing the column and hosting the website, I have enough upcoming personal appearances to list them. It looks as though I'll be judging, emceeing and acting as Grand Marshall for pet parades. (One event has asked me to be Queen and promised a special tiara. Can't wait to see it!!!! It'll probably have tiny doggie biscuits on it.) So (drum roll) here they are:

Sunday, July 17, 2011
2 p.m. - 4 p.m.
Furry Fort Thomas Dog Show

Saturday, July 23, 2011
10 a.m. - 4 p.m.
Beast Bash

Friday, August 5, 2011
Dog & Cats Days of Summer
Bellevue, KY
(Details to be determined.)

Saturday, August 13, 2011
1 p.m. - 2 p.m.
Pet Parade
Northern Kentucky Youth Foundation

Monday, September 5, 2011
(Time to be announced.)
Just for Fun Dog Show
Alexandria Fair

Nosey will be at all of the events with her "Kissing Booth" and fishbowl and will sell kisses for $1 each to benefit all of the non-profits sponsoring these events.

Come play with us this summer!!!!

Spring Pet Care Tips!

2011-04-09T13:09:00.000-07:00

"Hey, whatcha' doin' in there?" Nosey asked, scratching on the closed bathroom door. "Cleaning," I replied. "Can I come in?" she asked, scratching harder and whining. "It is 'may I come in,' and no, you can't." "Why?" she howled. "Because I'm using harsh chemicals and you're not allowed to be around them." "Why?" she whimpered. "Because you are a puppy and you get into everything and I'm keeping you safe." Spring is here and it is time for cleaning the house, getting the garden planted and celebrating Easter and Passover. So, I'd like to take this opportunity to remind pet owners to be mindful of their animal companion's safety this season. While you are spring cleaning keep cleaning supplies out of the reach of your pets. Store them in secure cabinets, far away from your pets food and treats. While you are cleaning, put your pets in a separate room so that they can't inadvertently drink out of a bucket of soapy water or get squirted with window cleaner. This goes for dogs and cats as well as caged birds and pocket pets such as hamsters and gerbils. Caustic fumes can cause these tiny creatures harm. When you are getting ready to clean, take up your pet's food and water bowls. If you can't move fish tanks, take special precautions not to use aerosols in the same room. A great trick is to put plastic wrap over top of the aquarium for the short time it takes for you to clean in that room. Don't leave it there for long, but it will keep the water from becoming contaminated. When you are washing windows or installing screens for the season, be especially careful to contain your pets. Dogs, cats and ferrets are curious and can escape in the few moments that a window is open and your back is turned. A fall can cause serious injury. If you have birds, make sure that they are securely in their cages. I can't tell you how many times I have heard of pet birds taking the opportunity to fly out the window never to be seen again. Pet birds are very vulnerable outdoors to predators. They also don't have the skills to fend for themselves and many who are lost starve or die of thirst. This is the time of year when pets like to be outdoors, so make certain that dogs and cats have good fitting collars with your up-to-date contact information on the tags. You might also invest in getting them micro-chipped. It is the start of flea, tick and mosquito season, so check with your veterinarian to start up a preventative regimens. Gardening is fraught with hazards for pets. Try to be as organic in your gardening activities as possible, avoiding the use of pesticides and herbicides. There are many alternatives to harsh poisons, so check with your lawn and garden center for pet-friendly products. Many bulbs are poisonous, so keep them out of paw's reach or avoid them altogether when planning your garden. Some examples of toxic bulbs are daffodils, Easter lilies, morning glories and rhododendrons. Eye injuries can be caused by thorny plants such as roses. The popular cocoa mulch should be avoided as it can be ingested and is harmful to pets. You'll also want to be careful when planting spinach, rhubarb, onions and garlic. These can cause severe gastrointestinal problems and even death if eaten by pets. During Easter and Passover celebrations, keep pets away from chocolate and especially the artificial grass used in Easter baskets. Spring is a wonderful time of year. Make it safe for your whole family by doing just a little planning ahead. For more pet care tips, visit www.marsiesmenagerie.com. If you have any ideas for future stories please contact Marsie Hall Newbold at marsolete@insightbb.com.

Our Indeterminate Duration...

2011-02-06T05:48:00.000-08:00

Last week, the day I had hoped would never come, did. Our darling dog, Nipper died. Tom and I are broken-hearted, though we are comforted by knowing that we gave him a long, wonderful life and did everything humanly possible at the end.

When we first picked Nipper up at the breeder 15 ½ years ago, I remember holding him on my lap when Tom wrote out the check. I looked at his dear little puppy face and thought, “I don’t love you yet, I don’t even know you, but I know where this is going to go. So now, I am going to promise you that I will love you for the rest of your life and give you the best care possible. And when the end comes, I promise that I will make the hard decisions in your best interest, no matter how badly it hurts me.”

We fulfilled that promise…

Our family and friends have rallied to our side with love and support. Nipper had lots of friends, even a little fan club made up of the children who live on our street. Every day the mail brings more sympathy cards. We could not ask for more.

Tom and I do not have human children. Nipper was our “child” as much as it was possible. We took him everywhere, even on special doggie friendly vacations. He gave gifts on holidays and we always signed his name and drew a paw print on any greeting cards or letters we sent. On his 15th birthday in June, we threw a special birthday party and invited all of his canine and human pals. I baked a three-tied birthday cake and decorated it with salami, hot dogs and bacon. The dogs drank from my Mother’s sterling silver punch bowl. Tom and I had a saying, “You are my darling, I am your darling and Nipper is our darling.”

Last week we acquired a puppy, a Basset Hound named Nosey Anne. This was not to replace Nipper, but to fill a puppy sized hole in our hearts. We decided to get her to help us to move on, as an affirmation that love is our greatest renewable resource and to keep us busy as we grieve our loss. The truth is, it is hard to lie about and weep when you have a wiggly, active, 8-week-old puppy clowning around, tripping over her own ears and needing to be let out. Her silky fur has soaked up many of my tears. I think of holding her as “Warm Puppy Therapy.”

The loss of a pet leaves a hole in our lives that never truly goes away. Other pets may come into our lives, but those unique bonds are never broken. We never really say goodbye. Memories are bittersweet, but as the days, weeks, months and years go by, we form new ones. Instead of crying when we remember something fun we did with another pet, we find ourselves laughing.

Many years ago I clipped a quote from the newspaper and taped it inside my prayer book. Unfortunately, I did not write down the name of the person who wrote it, so I hope they will forgive me for that. It holds a great deal of meaning to me and I offer it to all of us who are suffering the loss of a much loved pet of any species:

“Bless you for your devotion, bless you for your canine commitment to remain with me, if not for days without end, then at least for our indeterminate duration.”

Facing Pet Loss?

Dr. Stan Szotek, D.V.M., owner of Faithful Companion Pet Cremation Services says, “Sadly, we usually outlive our pets. Their lifespans are never long enough. In most case, we have to make a decision to euthanize. It is important for people to realize that this is a very serious and loving decision.”

He says that when a pet is aged or very ill it is very important to get good, solid advice from your veterinarian about what is going to happen.

“The most common question I get from my clients,” he says, “Is, how do I know when it is the “right” time? You as the owner live with your pets, you can see the changes. Do they still like to eat and play? If they have lost their appetites and their spark for play and just lie around, they are telling you something. Their life is becoming quite a struggle.”

The problem, he believes is that owners actually can see it, but they want not to believe it is real. But as a loving owner if they are not doing those three things you have to question if your little friend is happy.

Grief, he counsels, is an individual thing. “People who love pets need to have them around,” he says. “At some point, you will need to get another pet. So many times people feel as though by getting a new one they are somehow betraying their old one. That is not the case. In a certain respect, you are honoring that pet by getting a new one.”

Faithful Companion Pet Cremation Services
11815 Highway Drive
Suite 700
Sharonville, OH 45241
(513) 733-1900
www.faithfulcompanion.com

Ain't Nobody Here But Us Chickens!!!!

2011-01-06T12:21:00.000-08:00

My friend Jenny Durbin keeps fancy show chickens as pets. Today I went to her house and played with them.

As a "city-girl" I had never held a chicken before. They are soft and even, dare I say, cuddly. You can sit and hold a chicken on your lap and it will coo and snuggle sort of like a dog or a cat. Who knew? One even laid an egg while I was there! It was magical holding an egg straight from the hen! It was all warm from her little body... Tonight I'm going to cook it for Tom!

My next "Marsie's Menagerie" column in the Community Press papers is going to be about Jenny's chickens. Perhaps you'll be inspired to build a coop of your own!

Until then...cock-a-doodle-do!!!!!!

Move Over, Benji... Nipper is a TV STAR!!!!!!

2010-12-26T08:06:00.000-08:00

Nipper with Sheila Gray!

Nipper meets Rob Williams!

The ingredients all laid out and ready to go!

Nipper with Tracey Johnson!

Nipper and his very own "Mama Rose"... ;)

It really happened! Nipper made his television debut on FOX19's new morning program, "FOX19 Morning News Extra" on Tuesday, December 21st, and as dedicated "stage-parents," Tom and I couldn't be prouder. That little black and barely white fuzzy faced guy did his Mommy and Daddy proud, chowing down on those dog biscuits like nobody's business!

I demonstrated how to bake "Nipper's Favorite Chicken Liver Dog Cookies" along with the help of Tracey Johnson, the new co-anchor. (For all those who haven't met her yet, she's a delight!)

Doing cooking demonstrations is fraught with possible catastrophes. I've done dozens, yet once forgot the eggs for a demo at a library. It made it kind of difficult to make "Birdie Bread Waffles" as my big finish. *Sigh!* All those successful presentations and that is the only one I still think of first.

The hardest part is the prep-work, choosing a recipe, making lists, measuring everything out and putting it in cups and ramekens so all you have to do is dump everything into bowls, etc. Then, you have to make a finished product so you can show the audience how the dish is supposed to look. If this is for a morning news program and you want to serve something hot so the interviewers and crew can taste-test, this might mean getting up at 3 a.m. or even staying up all night so that everything is timed out perfectly. Thank goodness "Nipper's Favorite Chicken Liver Dog Cookies" can be made the night or even days before and don't have to be served warm!

Well, enough rambling... Needless to say, the whole thing went off without a hitch and Nipper's extended fan club gave him rave reviews. His eating technique was impeccable and his timing...awesome!

That's our boy!!!!!

Peanut Butter Doggie Biscuits Earn Rave Reviews! Nipper Gives Them Two Dewclaws Up!!!

2010-12-12T13:47:00.000-08:00

Nipper getting caught with his head in the cookie jar.

I made peanut butter dog cookies today and Nipper couldn't be happier. Here's the recipe:

Marsie's Menagerie Peanut Butter Doggie Biscuits

(Makes about 2 dozen depending on the size of your cookie cutters)

Ingredients

3 cups whole wheat flour
2 Tbsp. olive oil
1/2 cup crunchy peanut butter
2 large eggs
1 cup water
Cooking spray

Method

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.
Spray cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray.
Combine ingredients in a large mixing bowl. (I do it with my hands and wear non-latex medical gloves.)
Mix until ingredients form a ball.
Roll out on a floured surface (about 1/4 inch thickness).
Cut out shapes with cookie cutters.
Place cookies on cookie sheet and place in oven.
Bake for 25 minutes and cool on rack.

BONE APPETIT!!!!!!

I Died and Went to Doggie Heaven! Guess What? It Looks a Lot Like Mt. Adams!!!

2010-12-12T09:40:00.000-08:00

Well, it finally happened... I officially died and went to doggie heaven at the 20th Annual Mt. Adams Reindog Parade yesterday. I was asked to represent "Marsie's Menagerie" as judge for the "Best Owner/Dog Look-a-like" category.

The Reindog Parade is truly one of the greatest events in the city of Cincinnati. Everyone there is happy and smiling; proudly showing off their dogs (who are dressed to the nines in holiday attire) and very chatty! It is a great big dog party and people are at their best. (If not goofiest.) I have always believed that dogs are an extension of their owners and taking them out is like walking your heart on a leash. The hills of Mt. Adams were truly awash in furry love.

All days should be as happy as Reindog Parade Day. Too bad it only happens once a year...

Why I Am The Way I Am...

2010-11-26T11:22:00.000-08:00

MEXICO

TURTLE

My goldfish died last week. It’s not the first time this has happened or will it be the last. As I pressed the handle and flushed him/her to that great aquarium in the sky, I thought back on how my mother handled these situations when I was a child. Back then, I had dozens and dozens of fish and turtles, those types of pets that tend to give up the ghost on a regular basis; so I just know that she had to have been a mighty deperate woman.

Then as now, I was a great big drama queen. Age has only given me the gift of restraint, but believe you me, I feel it just the same. When I was a kid, I had no filters. That’s not to say that I can’t pitch a big old hissy-fit now and then, but I reserve them for the passing of warm-blooded creatures with fur. There’s a big difference and you have to draw the line somewhere.

One of the biggest lies that my mother told me was to stave off a “State Funeral” over my turtle Speedy Gonzales when I was five years old. I went to feed him and his bowl-mate “Slow Poke Slugger” and Speedy was gone. Now I was never the greatest at math, but I certainly grasped the concept that one was less than two. I checked under the plastic palm tree and on the table around the bowl. Getting down on my hands and scabby little knees I checked the floor. Realizing that he was well and truly gone, I shrieked so loudly that my mother had to think fast.

“Oh, Marsie…,” she said sorrowfully, “Speedy Gonzales is gone.”

“Gone?” I asked, wide-eyed, my chubby little chin beginning to quiver.

“Yes, gone.” She sighed dramatically for emphasis.

“Your Daddy and I found his shell in front of the kitchen door this morning.”

“His shell?”

“Yes, he ran away and the only way he could fit under the door was to take his shell off and leave it behind.”

Even at that tender age I had enough sense about me to not believe that a turtle could remove his shell. “

How could he do that?”

“Well, I don’t know, but he did,” she replied, summoning all of her “I’m the mother and know everything” authority.

She followed me into the kitchen where I was busily examining the small sliver of space between the door and the floor.

“He left a note,” she continued, lying through her teeth, probably hoping against hope that I wouldn't ask to see the evidence.

“It said that he was sorry, but he had to go home and visit his family in Mexico.”

“But what is he going to do without his shell?” I wondered.

“It’s warm in Mexico,” she said with a perfectly straight face, “So turtles don’t need to wear them there.”

That’s where my memory fades. Something tells me that Speedy Gonzales died and my parents found him first. But to make sure I’m going to Google “Naked Mexican Turtles.”

You just never know…

The Saddest Signs of All!

2010-11-21T11:22:00.001-08:00

Cincinnati Observatory

Mt. Lookout, OH

Fitton Center for Creative Arts

Hamilton, Ohio

It's not right and when it's not right, it's wrong! Okay, okay...I understand why pets aren't allowed to run wild and free, but it doesn't mean I can't hate the signs!

More to come!

xoxo

Nipper's Newest Favorite Doggie Snack!

2010-11-17T10:18:00.000-08:00

Check it out...I've found a new homemade dog biscuit recipe! Nipper loves it and I'm certain that your dog will too.

These make great holiday presents for the dog lovers on your list. They are inexpensive and fun to make!

Do you have any pet treat recipes you'd like to share? Please send them to me at: marsolete@insightbb.com. I'll add more in coming weeks...

Nipper’s Bacon Barky Biscuits

(Makes approximately 2 ½ dozen depending on the size of your cookie cutters.)

Ingredients

2 1/2 cups Whole wheat flour
1/2 cup Powdered milk
1 tbsp. Wheat Germ
1 tsp. Garlic Powder
1 tsp. Beef Bouillon (Use granulated kind, not a cube.)
Four slices of bacon cooked extra crisp
1/3 cup Bacon Grease
1 beaten egg
1/2 cup ice water

Method

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

After frying bacon, drain slices on top of paper towels. Reserve 1/3 cup of bacon grease. After draining bacon slices, place in food processor and reduce it to fine crumbles.

Combine dry items (including bacon crumbles) in a large mixing bowl. Slowly add bacon grease and flour, powdered milk, garlic powder, wheat germ and beef bouillon granules.

Stir in the bacon grease, egg and bacon. When these ingredients are thoroughly mixed, drizzle in ice water a tiny bit at a time until mixture is firm in texture..

Now comes the fun part!

On a lightly floured surface, roll the dough out with to 1/2 inch thickness and cut out biscuits with cookie cutters. (I use bone shaped cutters.) Place biscuits on an ungreased baking sheet.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes.

Allow to cool before serving.

Store in a sealed container in the refrigerator.

Home Baked Treats!

2010-08-30T07:25:00.000-07:00

Here I am with all the ingredients and finished products laid out.
Here is part of the crowd as they were coming in waiting for the demo to begin!

Here are my adorable little helpers!

This is Jessica Powell of the Newport Branch of the Campbell County Library. She is the one who invited me to speak. She is a "Librarian Extraordinaire" in my book. She even took the time to make a special display of pet cookbooks/pet care books and showed them to everyone in attendance after the presentation. Now, that is dedication!

Here is my official "Demented Martha Stewart-Wannabee Photo"

Thank you so much to the Newport Branch of the Campbell County Library for inviting me to do a "Pet Treat Baking Demonstration" last Thursday, August 26. It was so much fun that I nearly fainted from the excitement. (And from the effort of getting everything together!)

I met so many wonderful animal-people and we shared many great stories about our pets as well as recipes and tips on how to bake home-made, healthy treats.

Here are the recipes I shared. (I took samples of each so everyone could take home a little bag to share with their furry and feathered pals.)

Anne Crone

of “The Bird Shoppe’s”

Blueberry-Banana Birdie Waffles

(Makes about 6 waffles)

Ingredients

2 Cups Flour
1 Tbs. Sugar
3 Tsp. Baking Powder
3 Large Eggs
1 ½ Cups Milk
½ Cup Olive Oil
1 Cup Mashed Ripe Bananas
½ Cup Fresh Blueberries
Non-Stick Cooking Spray

Method:

Preheat waffle iron.

In a large bowl combine Flour, Sugar and Baking Powder.

In a medium bowl, beat the Eggs until foamy. Add Milk, Oil and Mashed Bananas.

Combine wet with dry ingredients in large bowl and fold in Blueberries.

Place Non-Stick Spray on waffle iron and make waffles as usual.

Note:

Waffles may be made ahead, frozen and popped into the toaster. Always make sure they are cool before feeding to birds. These are also good smeared with Peanut Butter.

Katnip Krisps

(Makes about 2 dozen)

Ingredients

1 Cup Whole Wheat Flour
1/3 Cup All Purpose Flour
1/3 cup Whole Milk
¼ cup Dry Milk
1 large Egg, lightly beaten
2 Tbsp. Bran Cereal
2 Tbsp. Pure Honey
2 Tbsp. Vegetable Oil
2 Tsp. Fresh or 1 Tsp. Dried Catnip

Method

Preheat oven to 325 degrees and grease a baking sheet.

Place Whole Wheat Flour, All Purpose Flour, Whole Milk and Dry Milk in a large mixing bowl and stir well.

Place the dough on a lightly floured surface and roll it out thinly with a rolling pin.

Cut the dough into small squares and put them on the prepared baking sheet.

Bake the catnip cookies for 20-25 minutes until they turn light brown.

Allow the cookies to cool completely and store in an airtight container.

Nipper’s Favorite Dog Cookies

(Makes about 2 dozen depending on the size of your cookie cutter)

Ingredients

2 Cups Flour
3 Tbsp. Vegetable Oil
½ Cup Wheat Germ
½ Cup Yellow Cornmeal
1 Egg
½ Cup of the Water you used to boil the Chicken Livers
2 Tsp. Dried Parsley Flakes
1 Cup Chicken Livers
Non-Stick Cooking Spray

Method

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Combine Flour, Wheat Germ, Yellow Cornmeal and Parsley in a large mixing bowl.

In a separate bowl, beat the Egg lightly together with the Oil.

Add Egg and Oil slowly to dry mixture; then add broth from the Chicken Livers. Stir together.

Remove Chicken Livers from water. Pat dry on paper towels and mince very fine. (I used cooking shears.) Fold into dough. Mix well.

Place dough on a lightly floured surface and knead until it forms a firm ball.

Roll dough out to ½ inch thickness and cut into shapes with a bone shaped cookie cutter. (I suggest you use a small one.)

Place on cookie sheets that you have coated with Non-Stick Cooking Spray.

Bake for 15 minutes until golden brown and firm.

Cookies should be stored in the refrigerator.
　

Note to all: I will tell you the same thing that I told the attendees at the baking demonstration: I am not a veterinarian or an animal dietician. Only you and your vet know what your particular pet can and can't eat. Please ask your personal vet before feeding any of these treats to your animal companions. Every animal is unique and may have allergies, etc. If you have any questions whatsoever about the safety of feeding these treats to your pets, please turn to the experts for guidance. I am a pet care expert, but my knowledge comes from personal experience, not from holding advanced degrees in animal medicine/care.

Fans of "Marsie's Menagerie" Can Also Visit My Facebook Page!

2010-08-16T18:23:00.001-07:00

C'mon over and visit me on Facebook. My listing is under Marsie Hall Newbold! Let's be friends!

First of all, check out Nipper's 15th birthday celebration: "15 on the 15th!" It was the social event of the season!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2071658

Every Dog Has His Day...

2010-06-14T11:01:00.000-07:00

They say that every dog has his day and tomorrow is Nipper's! It is hard to believe that that tiny, five week old puppy is going to be fifteen years old tomorrow. Where did the time go? But, most of all I want to know, why do dogs get old so young?

The same little guy who couldn't even gnaw his way through a Milk Bone back then is getting his own birthday cake tomorrow. It will have three tiers and be decorated with bacon, bologna, hot dogs and salami. I am the one baking it and between you and me, it is so much fun, I can't wait to serve it.

Here's a photo of Nipper peeking out from under the kitchen table. On top are the ingredients for a three-tier, meat-a-rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-ific doggie birthday cake.

Hope you can make it tomorrow! Don't tell Nipper, but his present is a motorized bubble machine that generates up to 1,000 bubbles per minute. His dad just came up from the basement (after installing the batteries, etc.) and declared, "It's tempermental, but it'll work."

Hmmmm...just like me?

Jake and Jake Sweeney!

2010-06-07T14:12:00.000-07:00

I have always been easily manipulated by the media. So, when I was a little kid, I had two goldfish named "Jake" and "Jake Sweeney." You see, the Sweeney car dealerships advertised heavily on Saturday mornings and afternoons, which is when I did most of my television viewing.

Who could blame me for wanting to use the Sweeney name? In between "Mr. Hop", "Shock Theater" and "Big Time Wrestling" I would watch in amazement, milk dribbling out of my bowl of Frosted Flakes while Mr. Sweeney hawked the virtues of dozens of used cars. He'd stand out in front of the dealership holding a microphone (which immediately gave him credence in my book) and the lot guys would drive up car after car. When he was finished giving the spiel about how swell each one was, he'd rap the hood with his knuckles and it would drive on as if by magic. Now, that was power!

Once, when I was about five, the Sweeney dealerships had a promotion that gave away a free pony (or $50) with the purchase of every used car. When I got all excited and asked if we could buy a car in order to get one, my dad said that we couldn't keep a horse in the city of Ft. Thomas. A precocious child, I cited a family we knew who lived in the city who had a horse. "You need a special permit," he said (thinking quickly on his feet), "And I don't know how to get one."

Fifteen minutes later I called him to the phone. It was the Mayor's office and they wanted to know where to send the paperwork. Precocious, thy name was Marsie...

Four decades later and I still don't have a pony. But I did buy two goldfish yesterday and for old times sake, named them "Jake and Jake Sweeney." They're nice, but you can't ride 'em. Hey, maybe...that gives me an idea. If not now, when? Gotta go, I'm calling they Sweeney's; perhaps they has a few left over.

Nipper's Serenade!

2010-05-25T06:03:00.001-07:00

Our dog Nipper has an "official" song. It's one of many, really, but nearly every day of his 14 3/4 years with us (except for the six weeks he was with his birth mother and littermates), I have sung this to him:

(To the tune of "Rubber Duckie".)

Nipper Newbold, you're the one -

You make our house lots of fun.

Nipper Newbold, we're awfully fond of you -

Boop, boop, be-do!

Nipper Newbold, joy of joys!

So pretty it's hard to believe you are a boy!

Nipper Newbold, you're our very best friend it's true!

Chorus:

Everyday you roll over and we rub your tummy.

Why? 'Cause it's so furry and chubby!

Rub-a-rub-rubby!

Nipper Newbold, you're so fine -.

We let you outside when you whine.

Nipper Newbold, we're awfully fond of -

Nipper Newbold, we'd like a whole kennel -

of youuuuu!

I have a theory. Life is a huge musical and there is a song for virtually everything! Do you sing to your pets? Bet you do! What songs are on your personal menagerie's "Hit Parade" list?

Cleanliness is Not Next to Hamster-i-ness!

2010-05-24T06:05:00.000-07:00

Hamsterdam.
Peace offering.
Release.
Materials of cleanliness.
Inside the ball.

My hamsters are mad at me. Squeaking mad. Why? Because I had the audacity to clean their cage. (Well,actually it's an aquarium with a screened lid, but let's not quibble about the details because there is enough discord in the house right now as it is.)

It had to be done. They were getting downright stinky and since they share my office and I'm the responsible-pet-owner-in-residence, I'm the one who has to do it, even though it makes me the "bad guy." I know that they spend lots of time getting their little lair "just right," but it's not like they're not used to it. We have a routine.

Once or twice a week, I put up the baby gate to keep Nipper out of the kitchen, place Sheldon and Leonard in their little hamster balls so they can run across the kitchen floor while I work, spread the newspaper out over the kitchen table, gather the materials and give "Hamsterdam" a good, old-fashioned, soap and hot water scrubbing. Then they get fresh litter, clean water, a new bowl of food and to assuage their pique (gosh, I love dropping pretentious French phrases when it comes to talking about housepets), bribe them with a vanilla Oreo cookie to make it all better.

But they are still spitting mad...so angry they can barely run their wheel. You should see them stomping around that cage messing the place up again. Ah, well...what else do they have to do? As my Great-Grandmother was fond of saying, "Everybody has to have a hobby!"

I'm a Dog Watcher!

2010-05-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

*Singing*
(In my prettiest, warbilest voice to the tune of “Girl Watcher” by the O’Kaysions):

“I’m a dog watcher.
I’m a dog watcher.
Watchin’ dogs go by.
My, my, my…”.

Now I may not have been awarded the Presidential Physical Fitness Award in grade school (I didn’t want to do those stupid 100 sit ups anyway), but as an adult I have excelled at the sport of dog watching.

You see, my inner child never progressed beyond the stage of pointing to every canine she sees and practically shrieking, “Doggie! Doggie, doggie, doggie!”

Dog watching never gets old and my absolute most favorite place in the world to indulge is Hyde Park Square. It is a dog-watcher’s heaven on earth. There is absolutely nothing better than sitting at one of those little tables out in front of Awakenings with a sugar-free, fat-free, vanilla latte and watching the pooches on parade.

They range from pure-breds to mutts, and the owners are all equally proud. Most are willing, if not eager to stop and let you pet their pals and share their stories. It is people at their friendliest and most open in ways they might never be if they didn‘t have their dogs with them. Admiring someone’s dog is a sure-fire conversation starter and a great equalizer. The truth is, from my own experience with my own dogs, is you are not just walking your dog…it is your heart at the end of that leash and you are taking it out for all the world to see.

Do you have a favorite dog watching spot? I'd love to know! C'mon, after all, turn-about is fair play!

Pussycat, Pussycat, I Love You!

2010-05-22T04:49:00.000-07:00

I'm besotted with the calico cat who lives down the street. We've never met, but I look for him (or her) whenever I drive by. He (or she) is almost always lying in the window, enjoying the sun and keeping a watchful eye on the birdies. On the days he (or she) is there, it makes me smile and on the days he (or she) is not, I feel a bit blue (for just a moment or two) and wonder what he (or she) is up to.

Is he (or she) partaking in a little snack? Napping on the bed? Chasing a mouse? I'll never know, but I'm always charmed by the thought...

Funny how that works. That kitty whom I have never formally met has become a happy touchstone in my life. It's just another example of how animals, sometimes just by their sheer existence can bring us joy.

I'm going to take Nipper for a walk and leave this little catnip bouquet on his (or her) doorstep right now. Perhaps I'll see the owners and introduce myself. Maybe not...sometimes it is best to remain a "secret admirer."

Do you have any animals you admire from afar?

Good as Gold(fish)!

2010-04-14T12:45:00.000-07:00

Oh, I have such a love-hate thing going with goldfish. I love everything about the finny little creatures, watching them and taking care of them, but I hate the nasty habit they have of dying on me despite my best efforts. Through the years I have had at least a hundred; from the dime-store Comet variety to giant $50 Raspberry headed Orandas. They have lived in everything from plain old bowls to climate-controlled aquariums with air pumps with names like "Silent Giant." And between you and me, none of them has lived for more than a few weeks to a month, with one exception: Eartha Kitt Fish.

Eartha was a Black Moor goldfish with long, flowing fins that put me in mind of an evening gown. She lived in a one-gallon bowl that sat on the counter separating the kitchen from the dining room of my single-girl condo. Eartha held court for three years and even had her own tiny Christmas stocking. Friends and family asked about her constantly and she became part of a humorous running commentary. The fantasy world that we concocted for her was far more glamorous than our own; when we weren't watching she sang in French bistros, dated movie stars and supped with Kings and Queens.

My chanteuse of a condo-mate provided more than finny eye-candy. She was a great companion and added a bit of sparkle to not only my life, but to others as well.
Not bad for a $1.75 fish from Woolworth's.

Eartha, it was my privilege to have been the one to feed you and clean your bowl. You continue to swim through my thoughts and all these years later, I still miss you.

There's No Business Like (Dog) Show Business!

2010-03-31T12:07:00.000-07:00

Here's a photo of me with my first dog, Zero Amy at the 1968 "Girl Scout-a-Bout" held on the football field of Highlands High School. There was a dog show and Zero won first place in the costume division dressed as a bumble bee. My mother, the Edith Head of Sterling Avenue designed the costume that featured net wings, a yellow tutu and pipe cleaner antenna. If you look really close, you can even see a little stinger sticking up above her tail. (My Mother has always been a stick-ler for detail!)

This was our second foray into dog show-dom that summer and we were feeling pretty unstoppable. (Sort of like Taylor Swift must about now.) And who could blame us? After all, we were coming off the heady experience of taking first prize in the costume division, then going all the way to "Best in Show" at the Ken-L-Ration Kid's Dog Show in the parking lot of Kroger in Fort Thomas.

That win came complete with a blue ribbon, trophy and the right to represent the Fort Thomas Kroger at the regional Ken-L-Ration Kid's Dog Show competition at Coney Island. That meant that Zero got to go to Coney Island with my Mother, Dad and me. Actually (as we are fond of saying), Zero took us to Coney Island. Now, being a dog and all, she couldn't ride the rides, but they did let her into the park. That was a really big novelty!

*Now, I'm digressing, but since this is my blog and I can write what I want, let me ask you this: Do you remember when you were a kid and a dog would somehow get into the school and run around? It was a really big deal...at least at Robert D. Johnson Grade School. We thought it was the coolest thing ever. The dog would dart into the classroom with the janitor chasing behind. We would laugh and cheer and stomp our feet like the audience on American Idol. But, why was this? It wasn't as though none of us had ever seen a dog before. Most of us had one or two waiting for us at home. But a dog in school... WOW! Now, that...that was just out of context enough to have us buzzing for the rest of the day.*

Back to Coney Island...

Zero didn't win at the "Bigs." My 6 year old self was kind of miffed about it, but from where I sit the whole thing was a success because it is one my my most prized memories.

And guess what? I was just invited to emcee the "Furry Fort Thomas" dog show sponsored by the Campbell County Public Library Carrico/Ft. Thomas Branch this Sunday, June 6 from 2-4 p.m. Ryan Stacy, the Adult Services Librarian who asked me, said that there will be four categories: "Best Looking," "Best Trick," "Most Obedient" and "Best Dressed."

My life has come full-circle!

Nipper's Favorite Dog Cookie Recipe!

2010-03-27T19:09:00.000-07:00

Eureka! I have found it, the best home-made dog biscuit recipe on earth. The ingredients are easy to find; it is fun and easy to make and best of all...*drum roll please* the final product is NIPPER APPROVED! Four paws up. He pronounced them (after taste testing two), "Good enough to serve the next time I have my buds over to play poker." Now that is high praise if I ever heard it.

Tomorrow we stop by to gift family and friends with the tasty morsels! Something tells me that I'm going to be extremely popular with the canine set! Now that the dogs are taken care of, I'm looking for a cat treat recipe. Do you have one? If so, please share...

Here's the recipe I used. Get to it!

Nipper’s Favorite Dog Cookies

(Makes about 2 dozen depending on the size of your cookie cutter)

Ingredients

2 Cups Flour
3 Tbsp. Vegetable Oil
½ Cup Wheat Germ
½ Cup Yellow Cornmeal
1 Egg
½ Cup of the Water you used to boil the Chicken Livers
2 Tsp. Dried Parsley Flakes
1 Cup Chicken Livers
Non-Stick Cooking Spray

Method

-Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

-Combine Flour, Wheat Germ, Yellow Cornmeal and Parsley in a large mixing bowl.

-In a separate bowl, beat the Egg lightly together with the Oil.

-Add Egg and Oil slowly to dry mixture; then add broth from the Chicken Livers. Stir together.

-Remove Chicken Livers from water. Pat dry on paper towels and mince very fine. (I used cooking shears.) Fold into dough. Mix well.

-Place dough on a lightly floured surface and knead until it forms a firm ball.

-Roll dough out to ½ inch thickness and cut into shapes with a bone shaped cookie cutter. (I suggest you use a small one.)

-Place on cookie sheets that you have coated with Non-Stick Cooking Spray.

-Bake for 15 minutes until golden brown and firm.

-Cookies should be stored in the refrigerator.

Petsy Accessories!

2010-03-26T07:20:00.000-07:00

Unless I'm wearing dog fur, I'm never totally dressed. You can quote me on that!

Part of the joy of having a black (and barely white) dog is if I have on dark clothing, the white hair shows and if I have on something light...well, visa-versa. There's no getting around it. Furry animals shed. I've tried asking Nipper nicely to "suck in his fur" but he isn't complying. I'm not willing to give up doggie snugs and hugs, so there you are. It is what it is. I've embraced dog hair as part of my "signature style." This is something I believe that Coco Chanel would definitely approve of considering that her nickname "Coco" literally means, "little pet." (Bet you didn't know that!)

I have lint brushes of all makes and models stashed in every conceivable spot. That's not to say that when I need one desperately, I can find one, but I digress...

Besides dog-fur, a lot of my wardrobe consists of pet-centric items. I own shirts, sweaters and nightshirts with pet-themes, slippers in the shape of bunnies and monkeys, scarves embroidered with images of dogs and cats, mittens with animal faces, a handbag with leather cut-out pups and an entire jewelry box of tiny creatures including dangly white mouse earrings. My favorite is a bracelet with a gold Cocker Spaniel charm that Tom gave me. (It is because, as my dear husband chuckled, "Nipper is "as good as gold.")

Speaking of Tom, he makes his own fashion statements with t-shirts that have Cocker Spaniels on them and several ties bearing the same motif.

But our favorite way to be "seen" is holding a leash with the real flesh, fur and grrrr guy on the other end. I always joke and say I got a black dog because I look thinner walking him. You've heard of LBD's (little black dresses? Well, Nipper's my LBD (Little black dog!)

Cuteohcuteohcuteofcuteness!

Love and Loss...

2010-03-20T07:15:00.000-07:00

This past week I have had two friends call with the news that their beloved pets had died. Even though both had been ill for some time, when the end came it was still a horrible, stinging blow.

A pet can crawl into your heart in a way that nothing else can. (I do not have human children, so I can not even begin to imagine.) They give unconditional love and depend on you for their very lives; every drink of water, every morsel of food. You are their entire world. When they greet you with wiggling, waggling, gleeful enthusiasm, that is your reward. We need to be needed by them. They give us more than we could ever hope to give them.

But there is a flip side. The day that we all hope and pray won't come invariably does. We have to say goodbye. Our pets pass away and our hearts are broken. Sometimes we have to make that hard decision ourselves, other times they leave us on their own accord. Neither is easy.

Their loss leaves a hole in our lives that never truly goes away. Love is our greatest renewable resource and other pets may come into our lives; but those unique bonds are never broken. We never really say goodbye.

To my friends who lost their pets this week and to those of us who mourn our departed darlings, I offer the words of Albert Schweitzer. I hope that they will offer some comfort.

A Prayer for Animals

Hear our humble prayer, O God, for our friends the animals, especially for animals who are suffering; for any that are hunted or lost or deserted or frightened or hungry; for all that must be put to death. We entreat for them all Thy mercy and pity, and for those who deal with them we ask a heart of compassion and gentle hands and kindly words. Make us, ourselves, to be true friends to animals and so to share the blessings of the merciful.

Nose Art!

2010-03-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

Now I don't mean to brag, but our dog Nipper is quite an accomplished artist. His canvas is glass, his nose is the brush and his medium is good, old-fashioned dog slobber.

I didn't always see it that way. It's not like I'm Martha Stewart, but one of my personal bugaboos is dirty windows. I'm the kind of person who keeps Windex wet wipes in the car. Not a nutso clean-freak, but aware.

So, in the interest of my sanity (which hangs by a very slim thread to start), I've decided to "think outside the box" and embrace Nipper's habit of "snuff-ing" up every shiny surface in doggie-reach as an attempt to express himself through abstract impressionism. My budding little "Paw-blo" Picasso needs encouragement...and goodness knows that nothing is too good for the
"Nip-meister."

Does anybody have the telephone number for registrar's office at the Art Academy of Cincinnati? Perhaps we'll have a show and sell some of his work. I'm sure it would "fetch" top dollar!

Hello! Do You Like My Hat?

2010-03-14T14:56:00.000-07:00

Do you remember your favorite childhood book? Mine was "Go, Dog. Go!" by P.D. Eastman. Thinking back, I had my parents read it to me so often that their eyes probably bled from staring at the dozens of brightly colored dogs romping through the pages.

My favorite part was a running "bit" between a pink Poodle and a yellow Hound. The Poodle would arrive on the scene wearing a frou-frou hat and after their initial greeting of "Hello!" would ask, "Do you like my hat?" and the Hound would say, "I do not." Then the book would continue with other dog antics.

Well, this mounting tension was almost more than my tiny little heart could take. The Poodle's hats grew more and more elaborate, until at the end of the book, she appears resplendent in a huge chapeau decorated with a flowerpot, mop, spider and pinwheel and the yellow Hound finally smiles and enthuses that he does indeed like her hat.

That "joke" has never gone stale. To this day, my Mother and I still ask each other once in awhile, "Do you like my hat?"

Oh yeah...go, dog. Go!

Dog Care Tips from Under the Big Top!

2010-03-13T07:26:00.000-08:00

Every dog owner thinks that theirs is the greatest dog on earth. But Hans Klose can truly say that his dogs are part of "The Greatest Show on Earth."

In town through Sunday with the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey circus, the world-class dog trainer and his wife, Mariya own 18 dogs, 12 of which perform in his act, "Klose's Performing K9s." Most members of the pack are "rescues," among them four Standard Poodles, seven Fox Terriers, one Great Dane and several mixed breeds.

As the owner of a Cocker Spaniel who can sit, stay, lie down, stand up and shake a paw on command (the most that any dog I've ever owned can do), I am deeply impressed by people with the patience and ability to train their dogs (to paraphrase the opening of the TV series, Superman: "far beyond the abilities of mortal dogs." So, between rehearsals I took the opportunity to ask Hans what his "Top Five" suggestions for "civilian" dog owners might be.

They are:

1.) Choose the right dog (or cat) for your living environment. Use common sense. If you live in an apartment, you don't want a Great Dane. Do you have an active family with children? Pick a dog that will fit in with your lifestyle. Research before picking a pet. This will get you off to a good start.

2.) Teach your dog basic things that will keep them safe like sit, stay and come. You want to be able to walk your dog with or without a leash. This will keep them from darting out into traffic or running away. You have to teach your dog manners and that requires a lot of time and patience. It doesn't happen overnight. The more time you put into it, the better dog you will have.

3.) Feed your dog properly. A happy dog is a healthy dog that is in shape. Don't feed table scraps. This is not only healthy for the dog, it discourages begging at the table. Keep your pet on a nutritious diet.

4.) Exercise is important! Regular activity keeps them in good physical shape and is fun for you to do together. Dogs want to do things with their owners.

5.) Get proper veterinary care. Hans believes that dogs (and other pets) require as much medical attention as humans. "You need to consider the cost before you get a dog," he counsels, "Owning a pet is a big responsibility and commitment."

What is the hardest thing to teach a dog? "Not to bark," admits Hans.

That's a tough one at my house, too!

Twinkie Rehab

2010-03-12T11:51:00.000-08:00

My husband Tom and I have no human children, so a black cocker spaniel
named Nipper has become the perfect, furry embodiment of our love.

I’ll admit it. We are absolutely wild over this dog and nothing is too good for him. We are those eccentric dog people that non-pet owners roll their eyes over. And if the old adage, “We are what we eat” is true, then Nipper has become a Hostess Twinkie.

It all started because Nipper, has suffered from ear infections all of his life has had to take various medications, mostly in pill form.

And guess what? It’s hard to give a dog a pill. So, through the years we
have tried hiding them in dog treats, peanut butter and everything in-
between.

At first, during Nipper’s puppy hood, Tom was a bit more pragmatic. So for awhile we tried the “tough love” pry-open-the-dog’s-mouth,-toss-the-pill-into-it,-hold-his-muzzle-shut-and-blow-on-his-nose-until-he-swallows-approach. Uh-huh. It sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work.

Look at it from the dog’s point of view. All he has is time on his paws. This is a great game. Why would he be in a hurry to give it up?

That brings us back to the current problem. The ear infection is under
control. There are no pills left but Nipper still expects his morning Twinkie.
It’s classic Psych 101 stuff.

This can’t go on. I’ve made up my mind. Tomorrow morning…no
Twinkie. I’m staging a snack cake intervention and putting Nipper into
rehab.

At least until the next ear infection flares up.

Lambie-Love!

2010-03-11T08:50:00.000-08:00

My heart is bursting, overflowing with Lambie-Love! I just got back from Sunrock Farm in Wilder, Kentucky where Farmer Shelley introduced me to Honey-Suckle, a lamb who was (quite literally) born yesterday. From the top of her pink little nose to the tips of her tiny little toes, she is adorable.

Forgive me for the flowery prose and overuse of exclamation marks. I have never held a live lamb before, much less fed it a bottle. As an animal lover, this was a "heart's desire" come true.

Sunrock Farm, if you have never been, is an educational farm dedicated to providing children and other visitors with memorable, hands-on experiences with animals and nature. It is located just ten minutes from downtown Cincinnati.

Once, several years ago, I won sixth-place in a goat milking contest there. Of course, there were only five other people in the contest besides myself and they were all under the age of 10. My ribbon was for "accuracy." But, before you laugh...keep in mind that it is better to have won sixth place than never to have played at all.

Here's Sunrock Farm's contact info:

103 Gibson Lane
Wilder KY 41076
859-781-5502
email@sunrockfarm.org

Open year 'round.

Sea Monkey Mania!

2010-03-10T03:55:00.000-08:00

When I was a child, there were colorful ads in the back of comic books advertising Sea Monkeys. “Enter the wonderful world of amazing live Sea-Monkeys!” they crowed. “Just add Sea-Monkey eggs to prepared water, look in the bowl and see LIVE BABY SEA-MONKEYS (Artemia) swimming around! Now simply grow and enjoy the most adorable, entertaining pets you’ve ever owned!

What kid could resist? Certainly not me. I’ve always been easily manipulated by the media. So I clearly remember cutting that little coupon out from the back of my Superman comic book and mailing it and $1.25 of my allowance money to an address on Fifth Avenue in New York City.

It took several weeks for them to arrive. Oh, the sweet ecstasy of waiting for mail when you are a kid. Time seems to drag! Funny how that changes when you grow up and instead of “The Miracle of Instant Life” the mailman is in the nasty habit of delivering, “The Miracle of the End of the Month Credit Card Statements.“

I would rush home from school and check the mailbox first thing. On Saturdays, I’d stare longingly out the window waiting for the mail truck. But, finally the happy day arrived.

That was when I was nine years old. Who knew that all these years later I’d still be reconstituting those darned “instant life” eggs and waiting with bated breath for them to hatch?

In the scheme of things, I realize that they aren't much more than fish food. (They feed them to the Jellyfish at the Newport Aquarium), but I was in awe of them then and still am now.

Even if they are the lowest guys on the food chain; what other pet can you mix with water after they die and they'll come back again?

Now that's the most amazing trick I've ever heard of!

No Cat(nipping)!

2010-03-09T04:24:00.000-08:00

Stop me before I start! It is not even Spring and all I want to do is run out and buy herbs. Every year I grow a "Scratch and Sniff" garden on a Baker's Rack on the front porch and that includes a huge pot of Catnip.

We don't own a cat (Nipper wouldn't allow it), but I do love growing the stuff to give to our feline chums. I tie it up with fancy ribbon and present it like a bouquet. Problem is, not every cat likes it. I shouldn't have had my feelings hurt because it turns out that they aren't ungrateful, it is because the ability to react to Catnip is genetic. Studies estimate that between 10-30% of cats are unaffected by "the nip." (Sort of like not all people can roll their tongues!)

Now I know. But for those of you whose cats get a jolt from the stuff, tell me this...do they prefer the fresh or dried kind?

Spring is Coming!

2010-03-07T06:35:00.000-08:00

Can you feel it? Spring is almost here! I noticed it one morning last week. We had the window over our bed cracked open a teeny bit and the chirping of the birds woke me up. They had that excited "we're making eggs" tone in their voices. Chirp, chirp...CHEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPP! One squawked so loudly I think she must have got an egg caught cross-ways on the way out.

So, here's to our feathery friends! Lay away! But, quiet down...at least until our alarm clock goes off.